The Right Catholic Mate

I've been in relationships with men who were completely wrong for me. One of my exes was a Cuba supporting politico fiend while I was more of a "Politics? Who cares?" type of gal. Needless to say the relationship ended with me sending him straight to Cuba (instead of hell) and him sending me to listen to National Public Radio.

A similar ending can occur with couples who have different religious views within the same religion. There may be differences in how you choose to practice Catholicism and in your levels of devoutness. This can put an unnecessary strain on the couple or make or break a relationship. It doesn't have to though. With the right questions and communication, you can find the right Catholic mate. Here are some tips to help you along the way before you send them off to Cuba:

Be Selective: Too many of us choose a partner without acquiring the proper knowledge. We have no idea if they want the same life or if they share the same views. We jump into relationships with people who don't want children or want too many children or don't believe in marriage or simply aren't as emotionally apt to handle life's hurdles. So before you go on that hot date, share some information over email and telephone conversations. Get to truly know a person before making a selection.

Compare Traditional Practices: Within the Catholic religion there are traditional practices that are followed. Some Catholics follow these practices to the tee while others are a little less strict about what must be done. It doesn't make anyone more or less Catholic but it does cause problems in relationships. So compare what is important to you and your Catholicism and what is important to your love interest and his/her Catholicism. If it's attending mass every Sunday then your mate should want to share that experience. And I'm not talking about sitting in a pew and pretending to listen. I'm talking about sharing the experience with a similar level of enthusiasm, affinity and devotion.

Communicate What's Important: Many people are in relationships that are not meeting their needs because they didn't discuss their needs prior to committing. To avoid being religiously disappointed, talk to your romantic interest about what Catholic practices are important to you BEFORE they become your permanent mate. This way there are no surprises when you're waking him/her up at 6AM to pray the rosary.

By Sujeiry Gonzalez of for


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